Of COURSE there’s a dog…

Remember this?  A week or so after it happened, my director sent out his usual post-concert e-mail.  In it, he listed all the things that had gone wrong that day – a pipe burst in the building next door, a bathroom flooded in the concert hall, the police were called to escort someone from the building, the principle violinist showed up 5 minutes before the concert thinking she was an hour early.  “By the time our uninvited guest arrived,” he said, ”I thought ‘Of course there’s a dog!’.”

That’s kind of how I’m feeling right now.  You know those times when the bad news just keeps coming and the only verses you can find that apply to your situation are in Job?  I’m there.  In fact, I thought I was there a few weeks ago, but I wasn’t.  It’s possible I’m not even there now, I just think I am.  Only God knows.

And only God knows where this is all heading.  So all I can do is throw up my hands and say, “Whatever You want, God.  If You need me to do anything, just let me know.  In the meantime, I’ll just let You do whatever it is You’re doing.”  Some may see an attitude like that as fatalistic.  I choose to see it as surrender, as admission that I’m not in control, and as an act of faith.

There’s a guy named Aaron Shust - I’ve featured a couple of his songs in posts before (and he’s a Steelers fan!).  Right now, he’s out on tour.  And right now, his 2-year-old son is in the hospital while doctors try to figure out why he can’t swallow and keep food down.  Tonight, this is what he had to say:

Instead of worrying I’m gonna trust God’s plan and sing His praises in New Mexico tonight! Lift Him Up!!!

That’s exactly the kind of faith that we need when we’re in a dog-on-stage situation.  It’s the kind of faith that says, “Of course there’s a God!”

Please pray for Aaron, his wife Sarah, the doctors and Nicky. 

Are you in a dog-on-stage situation right now?  How can we pray for you?

 

Post-its from God

I’m sure you’ve been there.  You have a decision to make.  Or maybe things just aren’t going the way you want them to and you’re confused.  Maybe it’s a little of both.  Either way, you just wish God would tell you what He wants so you can do it and get on with your life.  Maybe send you a Post-it or something.  You’ve been there, right?

That’s pretty much where I’ve been for the last couple of years.  I’ve said to God, “Just tell me what to do.  Whatever it is, I don’t really care any more.  Just tell me and I’ll do it.”  Now if you’re wise and unattached to my situation, you’re probably shaking your head at me right now thinking, “That’s a pretty dangerous thing to say”, and “be careful what you wish for”.  I know.  But sometimes life just gets to be too much and we just want the ride to stop so we can get off.  And in our haste to end whatever is making us unhappy, we say things that, in more pleasant circumstances, we would never consider saying.

There’s something to be said for surrendering to God’s will for our lives (and I’ve said it), and I’d like to believe that’s what’s at the heart of my “request” to God.  Some days it is, and some days, quite honestly, it’s just me wanting to be happy and comfortable.

So the other day, I had been praying that particular prayer for most of the day.  I went to church to pick up some material for Sunday School and this is what I found sitting on the counter in the office:

It made me smile because it’s not the first time in recent weeks that verse has popped into my head (or been quoted to me in one form or another).  “God, what do you want me to do?” I asked.  “Let my joy, and not superficial happiness, fill you.  Keep talking to me.  Be thankful for what I’ve given you.  That’s what I want you to do,” He replied.

It’s hard to argue when God finally gives you the Post-it you’ve been asking Him for, eh?

If you’ve been asking the same types of questions lately, I pray that God would bless you with the gifts of patience and wisdom as you wait on Him.  Keep the faith.  He’s always working and when the time is right, He’ll tell you what to do.

What has God been telling you lately?  Have you ever been blessed with a Post-it experience?

 

The song I can’t sing

I’ve been sitting on this post for a while.  I’ve started writing it a few times, but never finished it.  I never finished it because I always got sad or angry while I was writing it.  I never finished it because it wasn’t encouraging or uplifting.  I never finished it because it always turned into a pity party with a guest list of one.  But I’m going to try again because I now know for sure I’m not the only one who feels this way. 

There’s been chatter in the Christian blogging community lately about song lyrics that don’t work for us, or songs that people can’t or would rather not sing for one reason or another.  This is mine:

I really don’t think I’ve ever been able to make it through this song in church without either wanting to cry or wanting to punch someone.  When it comes on the radio, I change the station.  When it rolls around on the CD, I skip it.  Yes, it’s a great song of surrender (there’s that word again…), and it’s a classic in the Church, but I just can’t sing it.

I’ve been praying for years for the words of this song to be true in my life, but it just hasn’t happened yet.  I’ve struggled with this song when another friend announces she’s getting married or having a baby.  I’ve struggled with this song when my resume is met with silence again.  I’ve struggled with this song when I’ve been lonely or when money just keeps getting tighter and tighter.

Paul struggled with this song too.  It was written centuries after he died, but I know he still struggled with it.  He expressed dissatisfaction about something in his life and God’s answer to Him was the same answer He gives us:  “My grace is sufficient for you…” (2 Corinthians 12:9)  “I am all you need.  I am enough.”

So I will keep telling my heart that God understands my thirsts and my needs.  I will keep telling my heart the only satisfaction it needs is found in the unsurpassing love God has for me.  I will keep telling my heart God is more than enough.  I will keep trusting that one day, I will finally be able to say with Paul, “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation.” (Philippians 4:12)  And one day, I will be able to say to God, “You are more than enough.”

Is there a song you struggle with?  Is there a song you’ve eventually been able to sing because God softened your heart?

 

It’s time…

Some songs are so hard to sing because the words say things our hearts aren’t ready to say.  This may be one of those songs for you, but I pray that in time, you’ll be able to sing it honestly.  And joyfully.

 

Constipated cats

So last week, I was absolutely sure I was going to lose Josie.  She’d stopped eating, drinking and well, you know, the things that happen after something alive eats and drinks.  She was lethargic, spent most of the day (and night) under the ottoman, and when she did emerge, she was walking gingerly and was obviously in pain.  This lead to two sleepless nights followed by two days of me either near or in tears at almost every moment.  “She’s not even seven years old yet!” I argued.  ”I’m not ready to lose her yet!” I cried.  It was bad.

But a couple of good things came out of last week’s misery:

1. I gained a new appreciation for her.  I didn’t realize how often I’d ignored her or pushed her away when I felt that she was intruding on what I wanted to do (write, sleep, read, etc.), until I had to face life without her.  That, of course, lead me to examine other things in my life that I see as impositions rather than blessings.  (Oops!)
2. The prospect of losing Josie brought me back to the post I did on surrender.  Actually, God brought me back there with a “remember what you wrote?” nudge.  (Don’t you just hate it when God quotes your own words back to you?)  Through my tears, I had to admit that I hadn’t surrendered everything and finally come to a place where I could honestly tell God that if Josie (or anything else) was going to keep me from doing something He wanted me to do, He could take her.

Well, as you can probably guess from the title of this post, it turned out that there was nothing seriously wrong with her.  She was just constipated.  (Seriously?  A constipated cat?  Come on!!).  But in my relief, I need to be careful that I don’t forget those two days.  I don’t want to forget the lesson I learned about appreciation.  And I certainly don’t want to go back to clinging to anything that might lead God to feel like He has to take it from me.  I want to be willing to give Him whatever He wants to take so that I can do and be what He wants. 

What’s the strangest experience God has used in your life to teach you a lesson?

 

Jesus is STILL Lord

I woke up with this song in my head after a VERY difficult and exhausting couple of days.  They were days spent questioning, worrying, crying, yelling, wondering, pouting, and finally surrendering.  Apparently, my heart decided there was no other response to God after all this, but to sing the following song:

 

I surrender. All.

I use words every day without really thinking about what they mean.  I’d be willing to bet that you do too.  But every once in a while, (usually when I’m in the shower) a word will stick in my brain and I find myself pondering it and wondering what it really means.  Today, I’m thinking about “surrender”.  I don’t know why, but let’s explore it together and see where we end up, ok? 

I think that when we use the word “surrender” in our Christian circles, we don’t always understand what it really means.  There are tons of worship songs and hymns that use the word and I’m sure you’ve heard a message or two about it.  I think we think we know what it means and what it looks like, but in reality, we’re missing it completely.  Thinking about the word “surrender” has me wondering how often: 

• We surrender because we have to:  We’ve come to the end of our proverbial rope.  We’re trapped by our circumstances and surrender is the only way out.  This kind of surrender tends to feel more frustrating than fulfilling, more like punishment than a privilege.  This is the kind of surrender wherein we throw up our hands with a frustrated [angry], “I give up” kind of attitude.  When we surrender because we feel like we have to, it’s usually just temporary until we get dug out of our current hole and feel like we’re ready to take everything back.  This kind of surrender does us no good.  It’s superficial.  It’s circumstantial.  It’s actually not surrender at all – it’s just a bandaid, an act until we can get back on our feet again and carry on with the lives we want to live.  It’s all about us and what we want out of life.
• We surrender because we want to:  At times, life just gets too hard.  We get tired.  Or worse, we get lazy.  We don’t want to try anymore.  We’ve grown weary in well-doing and we just want to give it to God so we don’t have to deal with it anymore.  This is a sad, worn out and tragic surrender.  This surrender is accompanied by bitterness and resignation.  This is a fatalistic surrender.  We give up without having hope that God can turn the tide of our lives and bring blessing and fulfillment.  This isn’t really surrender either – it’s quitting. 
• We surrender because we get to:  Over and over the Bible tells us that God wants us to rest in Him (Matthew 11:28-30), that He is the one who fights for us (Joshua 23:9-10), and that He wants us to leave in His hands the things that can and will wear us out (1 Peter 5:6-7).  True, honest, beneficial surrender is the kind that says, “I’m putting my life in Your hands and I’m letting You call the shots because I trust You.”  True surrender is freeing, it’s joyful, it’s peaceful.  It’s not a lazy “I gave it to God so now I can sit back and let Him do everything” attitude.  And it’s not a fatalistic “I gave it to God and now I just have to see whether or not He comes through for me” attitude.  Surrender is giving up our need to control and orchestrate every moment of our lives.  Surrender is giving up our need to tell God what we think He should do.  Surrender is going to Him with open hands - ready to give Him whatever He needs to take from us, and ready to take whatever He needs to give us – so that we can be the person He can use and bless. 

True surrender is a gift.  True surrender is a privilege.  True surrender frees us up to accept whatever God has for us.  True surrender leads to rest, healing, and ironically, victory.

All to Jesus I surrender;
Lord, I give myself to Thee;
Fill me with Thy love and power;
Let Thy blessing fall on me.

Where are you on the road to surrender?  What encouragement can you offer to the one who is still fighting?